Soft Play have been through hard times since their last album. When they released Acts of Fear and Love in 2018, the punk duo (Isaac Holman and Laurie Vincent) went by “Slaves” – a moniker inspired by their belief that many in Britain are trapped in the thankless grind of a “wage slave” existence. But the name was widely perceived as unpalatable (for obvious reasons), and they’ve rebooted as Soft Play – a decision that led to a backlash among elements of their fan base and claims they were caving into public pressure.
Holman (vocals, drums) and Vincent (guitar, bass) address that faux controversy on “Punk’s Dead”, one of the funniest numbers on their uneven new LP, Heavy Jelly. Featuring a crooning backing vocal from Robbie Williams of all people, the tune blends quicksilver riffs with ranting wordplay in which they list the many insults flung at them since becoming Soft Play (“What the f***’s with the new name anyway? Soft play? More like soft c***s.”).
It’s angry and darkly witty – and ultimately misleading. After that early bright point, Heavy Jelly wobbles along, ticking off a “Broken Britain” checklist of angst-slathered lyrics that will be familiar to listeners of Sleaford Mods and Idles (though without the cheeky Casio grooves of the former or the off-the-leash punk fervour of the latter).
A lack of subtlety is hinted at from the get-go with opener “All Things”, which starts with a choir singing “All Things Bright and Beautiful” and then segues into a bland nu-metal onslaught. The same bludgeoning quality informs the pair’s bleary snapshots of contemporary Britain. “Steppin’ off the bus and there you are / Get that f***in’ scooter off the path,” snarls Holman on “Act Violently”, which lands like the Kaiser Chiefs’ “I Predict a Riot” without the humour.
If Soft Play dislike e-scooters, they reserve their true vitriol for gym bunnies. “Arms like legs, turning heads, Greek god, no trident,” spits Holman on Korn-meets-The-Streets wig-out “Mirror Muscles” – a potshot at an easy target that trembles with misplaced venom.
That Heavy Jelly is a squandered opportunity is confirmed by closing track “Everything and Nothing”. Kicking off with a spiralling indie chime reminiscent of REM, it’s one of the few occasions Soft Play stop gurning into the void and put their energies into their songwriting. It’s wonderful and this disappointing album could do with more moments like it.
Stream: “Punk’s Dead”, “Everything and Nothing”